Hello.
I'm SAMANTHA/SAM/CARROT. Troll in specs, laugh like the world's ending and sarcasm-ception is my favorite storybook. A fangirl, a writer, a dreamer.
What doesn't kill you only makes you stronger.
#justFYI some blog entry are private for some reasons. Though this is a bloody mundane blog and there isn't much to read but if I hadn't told you the password before, it means that you are either not that close to me or i am obviously talking about you. Other than that, hello. And bye.
Feel free to hop off, I don't mind. Remember to come back from tea someday~
"The Doctor's darkest hour. He will rise higher than ever before and then fall so much further."
"number hundred-and-fifty-eight."
you know something?
I realise I couldn't use blogger for some unknown reason for some days.
Its quite stupid actually,when I wanted to do some blogging then it doesn't permit me to do so.
But now it does,so its silly.

I was really feel dejected and disappointed yesterday.
I kind of understood what she meant the other day when I called to wish her happy birthday just to find out that nobody had celebrate her birthday.It wasn't that we didn't want to celebrate,but was that we all didn't had the time to do all the celebration.Some others were working,some were nowhere to be found while her dates are always remain unconfirmed.When we found out that she was free on her birthday,we did make amendments to make her day less terrible but she was unwilling to pay in the effort as well.Maybe I was wrong,she was feeling disappointed and dejected,just like how I felt yesterday thats why she didn't want to celebrate anymore.I remembered pestering her to go out in the end with my best mate to celebrate something at least and not be such a poor little soul stuck at home and I would help her give another bash afterwards when all of us have the time to put it out.I was so terrible,tactless with her feelings.Its a no wonder she would say that I will never understand her when it comes to her birthday.

..now i do.

Yesterday I receive a call from one of my clique mate whom I'm friends with since secondary one and are very fond of.I was rather blown off by her,really.She told me that she would not be coming because she wants to be present for her church mate's birthday party which crash along with mine.I was very upset at that,really.I kind of already expected that she might not come for mine but when I receive the call from her,that was a whole different feeling.I can't really accept it.The feeling was really deep and heavy,and you really would feel very sick and terrible about it,disappointment is such a bitch.

I called my best mate after that and told her about the whole phone call thing and she said that that dear friend should not have done that.It would be like an indirect telling that,the church mate is way better than me that she would go for his and not mine.I said that I do not mind at all,really.But when I hear the other girl who ain't coming as well,she really shattered my heart.She said that she ain't coming because the location was too far,ang mo kio is way easier for her.She ain't coming because she see no point in celebrating my birthday since she didn't had her birthday celebrated.

what the fuck.so this is retribution?
retribution because i did not celebrate her birthday for the past three years that she is doing this to me.
i'm fucking disappointed with her,really.

nevermind,so be it.
and the final thing i want to present.
the point gang.

all this: to chew xinhui :)
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